How to kill a muppet

Step 1: Purchase Moda-Dea Dream yarn in fushia.

Step 2: Decide on a swirlly scarf pattern.

Step 3: Cast on TWO HUNDRED stitches on size 11 needles. Increase every other row for a total of nine rows.

Step 4: Loose track of number of rows and fudge it.

Step 5: Cast off all stitches for over one and half hours.

This is a standard size closet door. (And Maya is making this post insanely hard to type even though It is less than one paragraph, because she is requiring that she sit between the edge of the desk and the keyboard, and therefore the monitor, and not in my lap like other 'normal' kitties do- i.e. Nigel. Moving on...) This beast of a scarf comes done to my feet when I hang it around my neck. I am 5'8". Now, should I ever decide to wear this 100%-acrylic-dead-muppet-of-a-scarf, I have to stitch the inside edges together, just to get it to the proper length. (MOVE MAYA! And no, do not sit on the menu button!) But just looking at these pictures, I am seeing marine life....corals, seaweeds and flagella, no what that's microbes. (Maya! The pointer from the mouse is not a bug-QUIT IT!) Either way this scarf is a loser F.O.

The good news is that it's off the needles and I can start on Cathode, without any help from the kitties. (Stop sitting on the down arrow!)